Friday, May 25, 2012

a sample of writing


Her father, Lanes Milford Dane Randolph was given two middle names by his father forty-two years ago.  Samantha Randolph wasn’t given any.  When confronted with the reason for this, her father replied, “be grateful, more is not always better.” Samantha knew that what her father really meant was less was always better. If given a choice, Lanes would have non-regrettably packed up things dear to him, easily fitting into the old green stamp decorated trunk left by his father, and moved from their spacious five bedroom house into a comfortable trailer.  Instead, he chose to honor his marriage vows.
 Lanes was a talker.  Elevators, bank lines, drive-thrus, no situation was too intimate, too constrained by a ticking hand, too pointless.  If there was a mouth, nay, a pair of ears, there was a conversation.  Lanes lit up like a refrigeration bulb, quickly and without prejudice. As if it were a game, Lanes would generally start the conversation by asking a question he’d already partially figured out, like, “Where are you from, I hear a long ‘au’, do I hear a bit of New England dialect there?”  It surprised Samantha that more often than not, her father was correct and that the person was exceptionally flattered by this.  

Friday, April 27, 2012

More City/ More Chemo


our street


Spring time in the city, of Chicago
That’s correct!  Second City, I’m here! Though I have yet to laugh at the next SNL cast, I’ve kept myself humorously busy.  Expanding  over fifteen miles of lakefront area codes I’ve joined three soccer teams, interviewed at bakeries, restaurants, sky rises, started a new “now is the time to get aggressive” cancer treatment, strapped on the bicycle helmet, and found multiple organic food suppliers.  Basically, loving it.

Dress rehearsal:
Cubs/Cards game
My hair is growing back quite aggressively. Two bra implants, one handmade by a friend, have given me the balance, the breast, and the confidence to wear fitting shirts.  Playing soccer, riding my bike, and walks to the dog park are helping rebuild the muscle I lost this past year.  Honestly, I’ve been out of shape on and off for years; after thirty how many of us aren’t?  However, working in the hospitality industry and my active lifestyle has allowed me to jump in on kickball in the park and family volleyball games in the past without much worry. 
So, when I was recently faced with similar social events at which my body complained and then resisted, I realized my rehabilitation went beyond therapy around my scar and arm.  My whole body needed to recover.
I’ve pushed myself more and sometimes it pushes back and I’m out for a day or two.  What a game!? Other than muscle loss my drug induced obstacles (from Xeloda and Tykerb) are burning of the hands and feet, diarrhea, nausea, and feeling tired and week.  Sometimes I can barely walk.  Often times food and its powers frighten me into not eating.  And at times my laziness makes me sad.  But they are all intermittent and can be reduced by getting plenty of sleep, exercise, wearing comfortable shoes, applying lotion, sucking on hard candy, and drinking lots of water--simple steps that make the daily routine enjoyable.
I continue to receive Herceptin for an hour every three weeks.  This treatment was started in Boise at St. Lukes, where an hour meant an hour.  Now at the UofC, the same treatment takes upwards of four hours.  I don’t like it. I waist a day because the staff is over stimulated by nearly dead people.  (Wow, that’s dark.)   I’m being treated by Dr. Olopade, noted as a “genius” doctor and the UofC ranked #14 in the US for cancer treatments. So, I put up with the poor day-to-day practices.  
Six weeks ago they started me on daily doses of Xeloda and Tykerb, 13 pills a day total.  Xeloda is meant to stop cancer cells from growing and decrease tumor size.  In another month I will have my quarterly scans (CT and Bone) which I’m hoping will show the Xeloda likes me and not the cancer.  Tykerb helps slow or stop the spread of cancer cells. It can cause severe liver damage.  My doctors and I are monitoring this closely since the cancer has already spread to my liver.  It is crazy how that little, tasty, brown glob is so important.
8 K 


On Stage:
As I noted above I’ve been applying and interviewing at dozens of jobs around the city.  Armed with my trusty Samsung map app and freshly updated resume I braved Chicago’s pothole broken roadways like a new kid at the hopscotch courts.  Often noisy and periodically last to join the trafficked areas I gave it my all, though, not without laying down some rules of my own.  I wanted a part time (2/3 days a week), job with weekends off to spend with my gf, and a fun and casual environment.  And sure enough last week I joined the Red Door Restaurant team.
In an attempt to do it all, I’ve also joined a once a month breast cancer group, as well as a free form writers club.  Online I’ve signed up to receive emails to an adventures meetup where I continue this competitive streak.

Oncore:
I expect my dad and Sherry in a week where we’ll tour the city with cameras and neck straps, street maps, full stomachs, and thinning wallets.  On the sightseeing list is a big bean, comedy routine, deep dish pizza, Chicago dogs, a lake, a tower, and me.
Okay, that’s it for now…

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Catching Up

Well, in the words of Fiona Apple, "I've been a bad, bad girl".  

Ha, did that get your attention?  Honestly, as I'm sitting in my mom's office, it certainly caught mine.  I'm like, "you have?" And yes, in a way... food, drink, and video games.  However, this story ends with me nicely wrapped like a pretty little present, bow and all.

Gift-Wrapped BooB:

About two months ago Dr. Wolf (real name) removed my right breast in another whitely dressed St. Luke's operating room.  In consultation the Doc described the incision leaving my tattoo unscathed but in the end removing the tumor was the goal.  In an attempt to better understand exactly what was to be expected I started to review online photos and went as far as watching a Youtube vid of a mastectomy.  BAD IDEA.  So, by the time I was answering questions from nurses naked, poked, and hungry my tattoo had already been stripped.  But we know better now, don't we?  Not only is my body art all in one piece, the incision didn't leave a massive dent and Surgeon Wolf stitched my chest to appear a bit muscular.

Radiation and Ribbons: 

People often ask, why Boise?  They've been asking this since my initial move in 2007.  And the same answer still makes sense...potatoes.  Hahaha, that's a great name for my family.  A clan of potatoes we are.  Seriously, I moved back to be with family but in-turn may have given up on some 'better' treatment options. And just in case that was true it's been important for me to know that other more widely known tumor professionals have reviewed my case and agree with the processes here.  

A month after surgery and two months after my last fuel-filled injection of chemotherapy I flew to Chicago for a preemptive move and to get a second opinion from the award winning doctors at the University of Chicago Medical Center on radiation treatment.  This just days after my return from a San Diego wedding. I was tired of traveling, of eating things unrelated to my diet, and of showering so that I may appear to be of decent upbringing.  But with open arms and a list of to-dos (mostly questions for the UofC staff) I put off playing with my dog and advancing my fictional video game character, a Dark Elf named Noug,  through the Province of Cyrodiil.

Sure enough, Boise and radiation was a-go.  Two days after Christmas I opened yet another gift, in the color of red and the spirit of giving, I was radiated.  My treatments take place M-F, 10:45 am - 11:10am, for seven or so weeks.  I lie on a hard glass bed separated by a single white sheet while a spherical arm rotates across my chest aimed at three specific locations (scar on breast, rt armpit, and rt lower neck).  It doesn't hurt, actually can't feel it at all.  Each day during the first week they had to remind me to lower my arms.  I get x-rays every couple weeks making sure no unwanted damage to the heart, lung, or arm has occurred.  My throat has gotten soar and cat-call sexy.  At some point I will experience what they refer to as a "sunburn" on the radiated skin which will most likely result in peeling and infection. They've given me lotion.  But for now I look and feel pretty great.

Filling in the gaps:

For those of you who don't know I thought I should clarify the name my doctors have given my cancer.   I call her Annoying, but apparently she has a proper title so if you have further questions that I haven't answered you'll know to google: stage IV HER-2 positive (estrogen receptor/progesterone receptor negative) right breast carcinoma metastatic to bone and liver.

Although my 6 cycles of Taxotere, Carboplatin, and Herceptin are done I'm on, and will indefinatly be on, an every three week treatment of Herceptin.